WANTED: Seasonal boy toy.
Seeking a single, caucasian male from 30-45 in excellent physical condition. Tattoos and a great manscape preferred. Must have a flexible schedule up to and including New Year's Eve.
Christmas candidate must be able to:
Accompany me to several work and social events
Spend a day in NYC shopping for additions to my vinyl record collection
Attend an opening of the new Gordon Ramsey restaurant in Northern NJ
Visit my family's house on Christmas Eve as this year's new "boyfriend with potential"
Dress up as Santa at the annual Animal Shelter fund-raiser and take pictures with pets
We'll have plenty of time to tangle in the tinsel and get crazy with the Cheese Whiz. Let's just have fun, make the rounds, and play.
Hotel accomodations will be provided as well as a rental car. Please send background including personal references and recent photographs ASAP to missclaus@hotmail. Photos must not contain other women as they will be put in a picture frame on the mantle as a rouse for the family. If you ring my jingle bells, you'll hear from me.
3 comments:
LMAO!
Short attention span tonight. I'm going to be the creature this week.
Being the creature is cool. And you can go anywhere with it.
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